How can I help?

How can I help? It is a question that we were asked many times during our journey with Connor and it is a question that we are now asked routinely about the families we serve through Connor's House.

Typically what people are asking is: what can I do? how can I fix it? how can I rescue you from the hell you are living in? The reality is that you can't fix it. You can't rescue the child or the family. But that doesn't mean there is nothing you can do.

Sister Frances, the founder of Helen House (the worlds first pediatric hospice house which opened in England in 1982) was once asked a similar question 'What is the most important thing we can do for the child and family' and I think her answer was perfect. 'Be willing to walk alongside them.'

It sounds simple enough, but for those of you who have walked that journey or lived that journey you know, it is far from simple. To walk alongside a child and family through the most tragic journey imaginable will stretch you to your limits. For to walk alongside is not to do or to fix but simply to be. It is to be present knowing that you cannot fix or rescue but more importantly than either of those; to be is to allow the child and family to be honest about who they are what they are going through.